Thursday, November 6, 2014

Sophia Turns 2!

Better late than never.... If you frequent my blog then this should be no surprise to you :)
My youngest is now 2, and for the first time in 7 years I no longer have a baby in the house! I'm happy to see certain things get easier as they get older, but I cant lie- its hard letting her grow up.
Having children back to back was what we wanted,

*Insert rhetoric*
-Yes! It was intentional and I DO know how they got here and yadda, yadda, yadda- 

but through Sophia I'm seeing something I wish I was more conscious of over the years... thinking back to this age for the other kids is a blur. Everything went so fast. I was spending time taking care of the youngest (at the time) and keeping up with the oldest, mixed in with therapies and insecurities and a whole lot of learning...
Now don't get me wrong. Mommy and Daddy have plenty of love to share for everyone. No, I don't think anyone got "left out" or "didn't have enough one on one time" but for ME, for my own personal "mommy records" cataloged in my mind, having kids so close together left those records smudged a bit. 
There are some things that I remember really clear: 
The same month we lost a baby we found out something was "wrong" with Roman. 
And sitting in the genetics office awaiting his test results, my OB called to let me know we were pregnant again with Lydia. 
I remember very clear the week we found out Sophia was coming, Noah was diagnosed with Autism. And I remember being 9 months pregnant with Sophia, staying in the hospital with Roman after his surgery, Holding the hand of my oldest, with other hand on my belly, weeping for both. 
There is so much more to my life as a parent than those difficult times. And now that the baby chapter has closed, I am learning to become more and more intentional in the way I watch my children grow. Hearing Lydia sing, Watching Noah play, Listening to Roman share about his day... I'm intentionally cataloging away in my mind. And no longer will I let certain challenges rob me as a parent. I will enjoy my children, I will savor this time.  

Roman would say "She's all our baby!" and Sophia really is.

Its an absolute joy watching you grow, Sophia Grace! We love you!